Muddled thoughts on privilege and prejudice.

So, biphobia within the gay community came up in a discussion tonight.

It's something I'm not entirely sure how to respond to. It's a prejudice, that like any other prejudice, needs to be called out and objected to. And in that sense a feel an entirely justified righteous anger. My bisexuality is not something which should be used against me.

But I'm also aware that it's a very complex issue, and that some of that prejudice comes from a history of marginalisation and discrimination against gay people. Bisexual people in some respects have been able to pass more easily, and have experienced straight privilege. And perhaps some of the prejudice from the gay community is a result of that privilege. That's not a justification. More a reason.

Right now, I'm active in my university's LGBT community. It's somewhere I've found friendship and like-minded people and a support system. However, I'm a relationship with a man, and therefore have the luxury of the straight privilege that goes with that relationship - we can hold hands in public, tell our parents, generally have our relationship recognised. I feel I'm getting the best of both worlds.

Which makes it hard to feel like I don't have to justify my place in the gay community. I find I get very self concious when I mention my boyfriend at LGBT events. I am aware that I'm in a gay safe space, and I don't want to abuse that. But in theory it's 'gay' in the sense of the whole spectrum of LGBTQ, not just 'gay' meaning homosexual*.

But my relationship with straight privilege is complicated. The kind of relationship I'm in may be seen as legitimate by mainstream society, but my sexual identity is not. So the LGBT community is still something I need.

It's just a matter of working out how and when to defend myself from the prejudice within that community.


*There's also the issue that LGB dominated spaces are not necessarily accepting or sensitive towards transgender people - Stonewall, for example. But that's possibly a rant for another post.